Thursday, 7 October 2021

Flo - An Update

Actually that's not really a fair title as listings aren't updated very often so there isn't really any update on Flo herself.

There is an update on my side though - I have signed up to be a MACC Warrior for her this Christmas. MACC is the Reece's Rainbow Miracle of Adoption Christmas Campaign - with the aim being to raise $1000 for your child's grant between Nov 1st and Dec 31st, as well as making the child visible so that their family may see them. I'm working on a couple of fundraising ideas so keep an eye out.  I'm also asking that anyone that may get me a Christmas present gives money towards Flo's grant instead (either direct or via me but not before Nov 1st!)

Every night, when I'm tucked up in bed, I say to myself 'Goodnight Flo, I love you' and silly as it may seem I truly hope on some level she knows there's someone so many miles away rooting for her. I found out that this month she will turn 5. I don't know the date so I'll be adding a 'Happy Birthday' every night this month.

Saturday, 8 May 2021

Guardian Angel

I'm nervous writing this although I'm not entirely sure why. I think some of you will be surprised. Some of you may wonder why this is the first you're hearing about this. Anyway, here goes...

I follow quite a few adoptive families on Instagram. It started with a couple, and from their recommendations, has grown. They cover adoptions from all over the world, single and multiple, additional needs and typical needs. Over the last year or so I've very vaguely wondered about adoption (and I mean VERY vaguely) but it's always been a 'not for me'. I'm too selfish, I like my lie ins, my lazy do what I want days, not having to think or worry about anyone else - besides, I can only just look after myself let alone a small person entirely dependant on me!

So back to these people I follow. Every so often they might share a picture of a waiting child. A lot of the children available for international adoption have some form of disability. I would look at the pic, think 'oh, they're cute' or 'it's such a shame' and then click on through to the next picture or story. At least I did until one of the accounts shared Isabella's picture. (Isabella may be her birth name or may be a name given to her by her caregivers at her orphanage)

I scrolled on by and caught up with the posts from everyone I follow but that little girl had lodged herself in my heart. I went back to the post and looked at the other pictures, and that was it - I fell hopelessly and helplessly in love with this little girl nearly five thousand miles away. But still I told myself it wasn't for me and got on with day to day life.

But she'd wiggled her way in and it seemed she wasn't going to go anywhere. I found myself lying in bed wondering what I would call her if she were mine (from what I've seen the majority of internationally adopted children are given new names). Was she a Kerry, or a Tina, maybe a Betty or Tess? I could see her as a Daphne, but strangely not a Daph. Carly stuck for a few nights. But I settled on Florrie, Flo for short! I started wondering if maybe this wasn't so far fetched. 

International adoption is EXPENSIVE and time consuming - every step of the way. With multiple agencies involved, normally at least two trips to the home country of the child, home studies, masses of paperwork to complete and supply, court dates and officials from what can be very different cultures having to work together! I don't have money to throw away and know that a countries qualifying criteria for adoption can be extensive and strict so I thought my first step was to see if I would meet the criteria set by Flo's home country.

I didn't expect it to be so hard to find out what the criteria would be - I did my own research and found some info but it always referred to income in $ so thought there must be a UK version somewhere. Using the $ information as a guide I was 90% sure I wouldn't qualify but I needed to be 100%. 

Lying in bed at night I would think of Flo and hope that she was safe and happy and being well looked after. Scarily I could even imagine myself introducing her to people as 'my daughter'! What had come over me?

After contacting several organisations (one of which was my local adoption agency) and not get anywhere I was finally put in touch with someone who had the answer - and it wasn't what I wanted to hear - I would fail the criteria on at least three points. I wouldn't be Flo's Mum.

What else could I do to help Flo find her family, or her family find her. Despondently clicking around the Reece's Rainbow website I stumbled over their Guardian Angel scheme.

The main aim of the program is to get the child noticed in the hope her family will see her. You don't have to fundraise towards the child's adoption grant but it always helps!! So here was my way to help.

So I guess that's the point of this long, rambling, personal post - Are you Flo's family? I know, that's a big ask. But you could help just like I am. Could you share this post, or maybe the link to her profile on Reece's Rainbow. Could you spare a few pounds to grow her grant to lower the financial burden on her new family? There is a donate button on her page which takes you through to PayPal. There may be fees involved as donations are in $ - if you'd like to donate I'm happy to receive the money and make a single donation and deal with any fees ( is my PayPal)

Obviously I want to help Flo but maybe there is another child on the Reece's Rainbow site that might steal your heart and you could become their Guardian Angel?

I know I don't have many subscribers and I doubt many people just stumble across this blog but who knows, this might just be enough to make a difference. At least I've tried, and I will keep on trying until Flo's family find her...

Saturday, 17 April 2021

Did I really want it...

You know that scene in Friends, where Rachel thinks she's pregnant, takes a test and gives it to Phoebe and Monica. She's been trying to decide how she feels about being pregnant, does she want a child etc etc. When the time has passed and the result is visible Phoebe tells Rachel that it's negative - and in that moment Rachel realises that yes, she does want a baby. It being taken away crystallises her feelings. Phoebe then admits its actually positive and she'd played the trick on Rachel so help her sort out her feelings.

I've just been told that something I had been dithering about, did I want it, what were my motives, would it change my life, if so how, was I being selfish etc etc etc, is legally not an option - and in that moment, reading that email, I knew that yes, I really did want it. 

So now I have to decide where to go from here...

(and yes this is deliberate vague and no I won't expand on it!)

Sunday, 14 June 2020

Books I've Read 2020

I'm going to update this with the books I read this year - just because I fancy a record!

Around the World in 80 Days - Michael Palin
Sanctus - Simon Toyne (Book 1 of a trilogy)
Pole to Pole - Michael Palin
The Key - Simon Toyne (Book 2 of the trilogy)
The Five - Hallie Rubenhold
Everything I Know About Love - Dolly Alderton
The Tower - Simon Toyne (Book 3 of the trilogy)
How to Stop Time - Matt Haig
Messy - Tim Harford (part way through)
Homecomings - Marcia Willett
Everybody died, so I got a dog - Emily Dean
Full Circle - Michael Palin
A Spark of Light - Jodi Picoult
Kill Your Friends - John Niven
Crossing Point - Michael Connelly
He Said / She Said - Erin Kelly
Ghost - James Swallow
One Cornish Summer - Liz Fenwick
Harbour Street - Ann Cleeves
Old Baggage - Lissa Evans
Fevre Dream - George R. R. Martin
A Very British Murder - Lucy Worsley
Dancing in the Dark - Maureen Lee
Campaign Widows - Aimee Agresti
The Woods - Harlan Coben
Broken Greek - Pete Paphides
Life's What You Make It - Phillip Schofield

Project 333 - Courtney Carver (part way through)
Enter Wild - Carlos Whittaker (part way through)
The Snow Geese - William Fiennes (part way through)

Monday, 1 June 2020

Lockdown Love Notes - Day 70 - 01/06/20

70 days - that's TEN whole weeks!

Saturday, 30 May 2020